Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Resilience spacecraft’s status after moon-landing attempt is unknown - CNN

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I can count

Wells Fargo Stock Rises as Fed Lifts Asset Cap After 7 Years - Barron's

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What do you love to do at night when you’re alone?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have a reading level above third grade

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Valerie Bertinelli Shares the Trader Joe’s Snack She’s ‘Addicted’ to — and Walked Around a Store 3 Times to Find - AOL.com

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t buy bullshit

Heroes of the Storm Live Patch Notes - June 2, 2025 - Blizzard News

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

The World Ends with You Director Tatsuya Kando Leaves Square Enix - Anime News Network

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand how hurricane paths work

Pregnant women warned against using weight-loss jabs - BBC

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

New COVID-19 variant detected in Washington state, health officials say - KING5.com

I have complete contempt for fakery

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

How to Watch Tonight's NBA Finals Indiana Pacers vs. Oklahoma City Thunder Game 1 for Free - CNET

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Scottie Scheffler’s wife reveals infant son’s bathroom mishap during Memorial win - New York Post

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

How did the Thunder get this good? Three perfectly executed summers created a 2025 juggernaut - CBS Sports

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I see through liars

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I can read

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I actually pay taxes

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes